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About the Book

Being a people-pleaser is fine until you have to say “no” to people. You often get afraid to hurt the feeling of other people. Julie A. Hawkins experienced the same difficulties as a yes-person.

Because of unfortunate events, Hawkins learned to deal with such problems. She developed six ways to set and communicate boundaries that will become a passport to stop the negative feelings, self-sabotaging patterns, and develop a self-aware, confident, and empowered you!

Read the Kirkus Book Review

A debut book about learning to feel good about saying no.

“Just Say No” became a catchphrase in the 1980s, when first lady Nancy Reagan used it to promote her anti-drug campaign. Hawkins, a professional empowerment and confidence coach, takes the principle to a higher level and applies it to life in general, and she packs a lot of useful, understandable self-help tools into fewer than 200 pages. Her “TAILOR System” aims to assuage feelings of guilt that one may have when one doesn’t say yes to someone else’s request. TAILOR is an apt acronym for her six-step system because she invites readers to implement it in a personalized way. The goal of her method is to establish and enforce personal boundaries, whether they’re physical or emotional. The book shows how to do so in nine categories: “Career/Job,” “Family/Friends,” “Significant Other/Romance,” “Fun/Recreation,” “Finances,” “Health,” “Personal Growth,” “Spirituality,” and “Physical Environment (such as home or office).” Hawkins offers specific situations that readers will find relatable; for instance, who hasn’t felt at least slightly guilty after walking past a Girl Scout cookie-sales table without buying a box? The author acknowledges that cookies are her own “trigger”—which represents the first letter of the TAILOR method. She smoothly unpacks the rest of the acronym over the course of the book; L for instance, stands for “language” that one may use to effectively communicate a boundary line, and O stands for the “outcome” that one wants. Although the letters spell out a complete system, each of the steps can easily be applied independently as well. Hawkins also sets out exercises and games that readers may use to identify triggers or patterns that may be holding them back. Along the way, the author clearly underscores that it takes focus to use the system successfully: “There is no big, blinking, neon light that says, ‘My boundary has been crossed.’ ”

A useful self-help system presented in a manner that’s easy to follow.

See review at

Say “No” Without Guilt

Six Achievable Steps to Confidently Set and Communicate Boundaries

by Julie A. Hawkins

Book Details

Language : English
Publication Date : 10/10/2019
Dimensions : 5.5×8.5
Page Count : 198
ISBN 13 (SOFT): 9781982235734
ISBN 13 (HARD): 9781982235758
ISBN 13 (eBook): 9781982235741

Saying “NO” Without Guilt: Six Achievable Steps to Confidently Set and Communicate Boundaries creates a solid foundation of fundamental concepts that make boundary setting more understandable and make saying “NO” a real choice. 

Linda S. Pucci, Ph.D.