Recently I was pondering a past relationship in which something had been “done to me” that felt so heinous I wasn’t sure I could ever forgive it. In fact, it happened more than 25 years ago, and I was still harboring deep feelings of anger. Since I teach Ho’oponopono (the Hawaiian process of forgiveness), I felt a bit at odds about urging others to embrace forgiveness when it didn’t seem I was fully walking my talk. In that very moment, I tapped into a brilliant source of illumination and let it rain down on me as if I’d just stepped into the shower. I finally experienced forgiving this person, a feeling I’d not been able to allow before. There is a bit more work to do, but at that moment, a sense of surrender and release flowed through me, and it was hugely freeing!
My past inability to let go of this offense added a layer of useless distress to the junkyard of emotions I’d worked so successfully to pare down. There had been a part of me that didn’t want to let go of these feelings (which is of course why I still held onto them). I wanted to feel self-righteous. I fought the tug-o-war of releasing this man from what he’d inadvertently done to me. Maybe he has held onto his guilt, I don’t know, and I don’t care now. What I finally got on a heart level is what I teach every day of my life: everyone is doing the best they know how and he was no exception. In my heart and mind, I finally released the energetic rope that bound me to him. That release, in turn, enabled my heart to grow bigger and fuller in alignment with Source and my reason for being here.
Everyone has something they believe they cannot forgive. Be it an insult, direct injury, perceived betrayal, disappointment or hurt. You wouldn’t be human if you didn’t experience this yet I ask you to imagine all the angst and pain you’ve caused yourself by holding on to the real or perceived offense? What is the price you’ve paid in your quest for self-righteousness and vindication? Was it worth it? Probably not.
When you finally accept others for the flawed humans they are you will look back and realize what a waste of time it was to keep this person wrong!
In the bowl of emotional soup, love is the main ingredient followed closely by forgiveness and compassion. It is a meal we must eat every day to survive emotionally and spiritually and grow as a human in this lifetime. It is your purpose to evolve. Holding on to junk hurts only you and stunts the process of your fabulous potential. This is why you must find forgiveness.
If you are having a hard time forgiving someone, then I invite you to download my free Ho’oponopono meditation and listen as often as you need to until you can forgive and see the truth; that you are both flawed humans from a Divine lineage. http://www.juliehawkins.com/free-things/
I recently had several people tell me that they read all my blogs. I was a bit stunned and certainly pleased. It started me thinking about the value I bring to others and what it’s worth.
How do you determine what your “value” or “worth” is? What value do you bring to those around you (personally or professionally)? Is it a dollar figure, contribution or service, unconditional love, understanding, compassion, or something else entirely? Most women and (a few men) struggle with the concept of “value” and “worth”regardless of what they do for a living, however, self-employed individuals often struggle much more with this if what they have to offer is a service.
Often the labels of “value” and “worth” are used interchangeably. I’m not sure it makes a difference, however, here’s how I see it. I ascribe a dollar amount to the word “worth.” When I think of “value” I think of how important something is to me. Of course, what holds value to me may not have the same value to you.
There are things I could not put a dollar amount to such as human, animal and plant life. If our Earth home ceases to have plant and animal life, what is its value? I’m not suggesting that would happen so don’t get your knickers in a twist. It’s simply an extreme observation of how I see the difference between “value” and “worth.” Life is not a commodity that can be assigned a dollar amount. You are unique and bring something special to Earthdom.
You are priceless. What you have to offer is priceless. Everyone has value in some context. Even the “worst” human has value because it teaches you what you do not want to have or be. How do you put a price on that?
Simply put, how you decide your “value” or “worth,” is highly dependent on context, perspective, and beliefs. Additionally, do not confuse what you earn with what you are worth.
You come into this life with no understanding of the concepts of “value” or “worth” and as you grow you learn a version of what these concepts mean. Then these concepts become your beliefs until you find another definition you like better. If you need another version of how you define your own “value” or “worth” then check out my tips below. Ask yourself the following:
1. What are my current beliefs about my worth and/or value? How did I determine this? What is it based on?
2. Am I confusing my value with my earning power?
3. What context am I using to discern my worth?
4. What do I offer to those around me, both personally and professionally? What do I think about this?
As to your monetary value if you provide a product or service, ask your clients/customers what is it worth to them? What is it worth to you?
Would you like to have a different belief about your “value” and/or “worth”? Then create one. Remember, you and you alone, decide what your “value” and “worth” is.